I visited Paramus New Jersey over Memorial Day weekend. It's less than 10 miles from the biggest city in the country (NYC) but you wouldn't have known by talking to the people there.

Me: "What's the best way to get into the city?"

Hotel Clerk: "What city?"

The thing that really got me though was the fact that it is illegal to purchase non-food items on a Sunday. In Paramus you can't purchase paper towels on a Sunday but if you travel a Just few miles east you can purchase a hooker any time!

I've recently seen a number hybrid cars with special Virginia plates that read "Clean Special Fuel." Since hybrid cars run on gasoline, I guess my 430hp Trans Am that gets 9mpg also runs on "Clean Special Fuel."

So I went to a Sushi bar for the first time last night. The place was upscale and yuppie and I think it may have been sponsored by IKEA. The sushi tasted kinda fishy...

Do the people that work at Phillip Morris get discounts on cigarettes? Are frequent smoke breaks looked upon favorably? Do employees get fired if they smoke a competitor's brand? Perhaps ironically, they make it extreamly challenging for smokers indulge in their habit. Oh the conflict of interest...

Sometimes new inventions are really a step in the wrong direction. Take automatic flush toilets for example. Half the time they don't work and half the time it flushes randomly and sprays your ass with toilet water (and not Eau de Toilet).

Actual Fortune Cookie fortune from Chinese restaurant in DC Chinatown: "You will have some new clothes soon."

So I'm a consultant now and I work at the client site. The floor I work on is in between the basement (floor 0) and the first floor (floor 1). So I guess that makes the floor I work on floor 0.5. I feel like I'm in the movie "Being John Malkovich."